Grandparents are just that GRANDPARENTS...
Grandparents are just that…. Grandparents. They were not meant to be the parent. If the grandparent was meant to parent a child, the child would have been born to the grandparent. That is what some grandparents need to learn and understand. When you have willing and able parent(s) to care for a child then the parent(s) of the child is the person(s) responsible for the care of the child. Should one parent become unable to care for a child and the other parent can, and is willing and able, the responsibility goes to the able and willing parent. NOT A GRANDPARENT!
What Is Parental Alienation?
Parental alienation occurs any time that a parent, relative or friend speaks badly about another parent so that a child can hear what is being said. Alienating behavior may be mild, moderate or severe. All parents are likely to "lose it" and be inappropriate with their words around children, however, when there is a predominance of negative messages being communicated to a child, these messages can seriously erode the child’s psychological well-being. In severe cases of parental alienation, children are manipulated and brainwashed (programmed) into such states of confusion that their perception of events and people around them are severely distorted.
Parental alienation in its most severe form is a heinous form of child abuse and neglect. It is a dangerous manipulation of children’s minds to alter their perception of reality about another parent. The purpose of marginalizing this parent is that he or she has no means to be an effective parent or to cut that parent out of a child’s life entirely, called a parentectomy.
Severe cases of parental alienation have the characteristics of being complicated in two ways. Combative parents duel with conflicting stories of "he said / she said," and make it very difficult to determine who is telling the truth. Brainwashed children often support the side of the offending parent with dramatic stories of how they have been abused by the target parent. As target parents argue their position, they often seem defensive even when they are telling the truth. Programmed children lose their own sense of reason and their ability to express their own choice in the matter. If the alienator is not contained, these manipulations of the child’s mind become the incubator of their own future psychological problems. These children have an altered perception of reality that is not in their best interest or in the best interest of society.
Unfortunately, in many cases, fully capable parents and their extended family and friends who love the child and would provide a nurturing and healthy family life are eliminated. Once the cutting out of a parent has occurred the child is left under the full care of the most disturbed and dysfunctional parent. These tragedies are played out in our family law courts daily.
Target parents find that normal methods of handling parental conflict such as mediation and therapy do not work. They are forced to appeal to a judge to make a decision that will enable them to continue to see their children. This is often an expensive and perilous path that rarely results in a satisfying outcome as few people, including judges, attorneys and therapists understand the nature of the problem.
Youtube has a great wealth of information:
Start here.. <object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8E_asXkqYl4&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/8E_asXkqYl4&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
This video about sums it all up. It is a very sick and twisted, childish way for someone who is supposed to be a parent, caregiver and the beneficiary of the wonderful gift called “A Child” to behave. If you truly love your child, you would not inflict this pain on them. If you are one guilty of PAS your rights as a parent should be taken away. I know that sounds cliché or catch 22 like, however by hating your X spouse to the point that you are destroying your own child is hurting your child, not yourself. It is selfish, vindictive and downright wrong. You will be the one to suffer years down the road when you are scratching your head wondering why your child is not a healthy, happy, productive adult. Remember as we age, we grow spiritually, emotionally and gather information that makes us wise. This reminds me of a question I once heard and older person ask of a younger person who was getting a tattoo. “Do you think you will still like it when you are 70?” Think back through your life, your ideas on what you like have changed through the years, so when you are 70, if you make it that long, or when you are 40, 50 or 60, think back to what you have done. See how it has affected your children then. You will live with regret.
Alienation is not love; it is a hatred that breeds like mosquitoes in stagnate water. I hope your wearing your kneepads to church this Sunday, you are sure to need them for what you have done.
What Is Parental Alienation?
Parental alienation occurs any time that a parent, relative or friend speaks badly about another parent so that a child can hear what is being said. Alienating behavior may be mild, moderate or severe. All parents are likely to "lose it" and be inappropriate with their words around children, however, when there is a predominance of negative messages being communicated to a child, these messages can seriously erode the child’s psychological well-being. In severe cases of parental alienation, children are manipulated and brainwashed (programmed) into such states of confusion that their perception of events and people around them are severely distorted.
Parental alienation in its most severe form is a heinous form of child abuse and neglect. It is a dangerous manipulation of children’s minds to alter their perception of reality about another parent. The purpose of marginalizing this parent is that he or she has no means to be an effective parent or to cut that parent out of a child’s life entirely, called a parentectomy.
The Tragic Result
Severe cases of parental alienation have the characteristics of being complicated in two ways. Combative parents duel with conflicting stories of "he said / she said," and make it very difficult to determine who is telling the truth. Brainwashed children often support the side of the offending parent with dramatic stories of how they have been abused by the target parent. As target parents argue their position, they often seem defensive even when they are telling the truth. Programmed children lose their own sense of reason and their ability to express their own choice in the matter. If the alienator is not contained, these manipulations of the child’s mind become the incubator of their own future psychological problems. These children have an altered perception of reality that is not in their best interest or in the best interest of society.
Unfortunately, in many cases, fully capable parents and their extended family and friends who love the child and would provide a nurturing and healthy family life are eliminated. Once the cutting out of a parent has occurred the child is left under the full care of the most disturbed and dysfunctional parent. These tragedies are played out in our family law courts daily.
Target parents find that normal methods of handling parental conflict such as mediation and therapy do not work. They are forced to appeal to a judge to make a decision that will enable them to continue to see their children. This is often an expensive and perilous path that rarely results in a satisfying outcome as few people, including judges, attorneys and therapists understand the nature of the problem.
Youtube has a great wealth of information:
Start here.. <object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8E_asXkqYl4&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/8E_asXkqYl4&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
This video about sums it all up. It is a very sick and twisted, childish way for someone who is supposed to be a parent, caregiver and the beneficiary of the wonderful gift called “A Child” to behave. If you truly love your child, you would not inflict this pain on them. If you are one guilty of PAS your rights as a parent should be taken away. I know that sounds cliché or catch 22 like, however by hating your X spouse to the point that you are destroying your own child is hurting your child, not yourself. It is selfish, vindictive and downright wrong. You will be the one to suffer years down the road when you are scratching your head wondering why your child is not a healthy, happy, productive adult. Remember as we age, we grow spiritually, emotionally and gather information that makes us wise. This reminds me of a question I once heard and older person ask of a younger person who was getting a tattoo. “Do you think you will still like it when you are 70?” Think back through your life, your ideas on what you like have changed through the years, so when you are 70, if you make it that long, or when you are 40, 50 or 60, think back to what you have done. See how it has affected your children then. You will live with regret.
Alienation is not love; it is a hatred that breeds like mosquitoes in stagnate water. I hope your wearing your kneepads to church this Sunday, you are sure to need them for what you have done.
